Martha, Martha.....

Oh Martha, I am so disappointed. Your February issue is, well, just so blah. Chocolate sauce and vanilla ice cream on the cover?! THE COVER! Of Martha Stewart Living!

I could understand had she trekked to a cacao plantation in Venezuela and hand harvested the cacao pods, roasted and ground the beans herself on her collection of antique whatever the things are called that you use to grind cocoa beans that she picked up at a tag sale in the Hampton's. Or if she had grown her own orchids to harvest vanilla pods at her summer home in Madagascar and used those beans, along with milk and cream that she obtained from her lovingly cared for cows from her Connecticut home.....but that was not the case and really how uninspiring this cover was.

I buy the February issue every year, a friend and I have a challenge to make whatever insanely over the top creation food wise is on the cover. Last year the cover showed precious Chocolate Ganache Tartlets with pastel heart shaped meringues. Once Martha herself and her crazy collection of cats were on the cover. I found that to be a little disturbing. Martha and her cats for Valentines Day? I don't know, maybe that's when she just got out of prison...

Don't we secretly want Martha to always be over the top? I remember watching her show once in the late 90's and she was making an Easter ham that had little slits stuffed with herbs and garlic and then you baked the whole thing on a bed of freshly mown grass. Seriously. And don't get me started on her chickens.

One of my favorite Martha finds was a little known magazine called "IS Martha Stewart Living" it was a parody of her show and magazine. Some of the subjects discussed were "How to dominate at tag sales", "How to make your own water", and my favorite featured a cover of Martha and the Pope. The Pope of course was kissing Martha's ring. Don't judge me. It was funny, and it wasn't the real Pope, so there.

So I find myself in a quandary. The cover recipe is not a big deal, the recipe that should have been used? The Chocolate-Creme Brulee Frozen Sandwiches made with a luscious Chocolate Creme Brulee and Sugar Tuiles. Seriously decadent, over the top, and Martha worthy.

So what did I make instead? My daughter asked if she could bake with me. We purchased the Norpro Donut pans over the Christmas holiday and she wanted to make donuts. They turned out okay, cakey, vanilla scented, not stupendous but the sweetness and goodness came from spending time with Morgan. Who needs Martha anyway.

Vanilla Cake Donuts for Morgan

2 cups all purpose flour

3/4 cup granulated sugar

2 tsp baking powder

1/4 tsp ground nutmeg

1 tsp salt 3/4 cup milk

2 eggs beaten

2 tsp vanilla extract

1 tbsp room temperature butter


1 cup confectioners sugar

2 tbsp HOT water

Preheat the oven to 325F. Lightly grease the donut pan. In a large bowl, whisk to combine the flour, sugar, baking powder, nutmeg, and salt. Stir in the milk, eggs, vanilla and butter. Beat together until well blended. Don't over mix.

Fill each donut cup approximately 3/4 full. Bake for 8-10 minutes until donuts spring back when touched. Allow to cool slightly before removing from pan.

To make glaze, blend the confectioners sugar and hot water in a small bowl. Dip donuts in the glaze.

Makes 12 donuts.


  1. You own a donut pan. Wow. Oh wow. I didn't even know those exist--and that is why I love to eat what you cook.

    My favorite Martha idea was when she was making gift wrap that looked like wood. It had about 47 steps that involved tools that one cannot own unless they flirt with a blacksmith. And the end result looked like my parents' 70's wood paneling. Nothing says happy birthday like faux wood.

    Please make the brulee sandwiches. Post pics. And send some.

  2. I personally loved the bris brunch, featuring teeny, tiny meatballs and calamari tips in a red sauce.